The Pixels

Elemental Video Game Critiques

Search Results for: zelda

17 min read

“When life itself seems lunatic, who knows where madness lies? Perhaps to be too practical is madness. To surrender dreams — this may be madness. Too much sanity may be madness — and maddest of all: to see life as it is, and not as it should be!”
―Miguel de Cervantes, Don Quixote

18 min read

“If pain must come, may it come quickly. Because I have a life to live, and I need to live it in the best way possible.”
-Paulo Coelho, By the River Piedra I Sat Down and Wept

15 min read

“No art or learning is to be pursued halfheartedly…and any art worth learning will certainly reward more or less generously the effort made to study it.”
― Murasaki Shikibu, The Tale of Genji

16 min read

“Napalm, son. Nothing else in the world smells like that. I love the smell of napalm in the morning.”
-Lt. Colonel Bill Kilgore, Apocalypse Now

13 min read

“He was after a sensational story and this, of course, could not be constructed out of mere truth; not out of officially released truth, anyway. It was essential that the news-reading public should feel, first, that the community was in danger and secondly that people—well-off people, “official” people—who ought to have known better, were to blame for it.”
―Richard Adams, The Plague Dogs

4 min read

So a tiny paper weight from a 3rd-world country video game company was recently released and it set the internet on fire like so much dog crap in a big, runny paper bag. Ladies and leotards, the Nintendo Switch, a device so inflammatory it summoned the shock jocks and mouthbreathers from the dark recesses of their dimly lit parents’ basements to spew their bile and record close-ups of their in-grown hairs. The Switch, if you forgot to have your mom pay your internet bill, is the lovechild of John Podesta and Anthony Weiner, in other words, it’s a home system and a handheld, or as I prefer: a homewreck and a port-a-potty. For some reason, this is exactly what a world of over-privileged whiners needed for a punching bag.

8 min read

It’s still the same old story
A fight for love and glory
A case of do or die
The world will always welcome lovers
As time goes by
– Herman Hupfeld

20 min read

“He always thought of the sea as ‘la mar’ which is what people call her in Spanish when they love her. Sometimes those who love her say bad things of her but they are always said as though she were a woman. Some of the younger fishermen… spoke of her as ‘el mar’ which is masculine. They spoke of her as a contestant or a place or even an enemy. But the old man always thought of her as feminine and as something that gave or withheld great favours, and if she did wild or wicked things it was because she could not help them. The moon affects her as it does a woman, he thought.”
-Ernest Hemingway, The Old Man and the Sea

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11 min read

“The 3 types of terror: The Gross-out: the sight of a severed head tumbling down a flight of stairs, it’s when the lights go out and something green and slimy splatters against your arm. The Horror: the unnatural, spiders the size of bears, the dead waking up and walking around, it’s when the lights go out and something with claws grabs you by the arm. And the last and worse one: Terror, when you come home and notice everything you own had been taken away and replaced by an exact substitute. It’s when the lights go out and you feel something behind you, you hear it, you feel its breath against your ear, but when you turn around, there’s nothing there…”
-Stephen King

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9 min read

“Me and you and you and me
No matter how they toss the dice, it had to be
The only one for me is you, and you for me
So happy together”
-The Turtles

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